Bipolar: Neurodivergent and Disability

I’m not just neurodivergent because of my Autism or ADHD. I’m also neurodivergent because of my Bipolar and I want to talk a bit about my experiences with manic episodes as well as why I view them as neurodivergent.

I used to fear my manic episodes. I didn't have the awareness that I do now. I didn't know how to look after myself. I didn't have a support system around me. I didn't have the accommodations, adjustments or tools that I have now. As a result of all of this, it meant that my manic episodes had consequences as well as a negative impact on my life. I don't fear my manic episodes now. I still experience manic episodes. I approach them with seriousness, compassion and curiosity but no longer fear. 

I recognise them for what they are; a change in energy, emotions, thinking, behaviours and perception of time but I approach my mania similar to how I approach my other differences. I adjust my environment accordingly, I use tools and strategies that help with the changes and I have a support system who helps. I minimise distress from the changes by accommodating the changes. I guess it's why I see my bipolar as neurodivergent instead of a disorder.

l used to view it as a disorder when I was first diagnosed though because it was challenging and had a negative impact on my life. It was also the only language I was given because I hadn’t been introduced to the neurodiversity paradigm. It's no longer as disruptive to my life and while it's still challenging, it's just as challenging as my Autism or ADHD.

I also view it as a disability. I can still function living with my manic episodes. It just requires changing what functioning looks like for me and it also requires accommodations, extra tools, extra support, adjustments and yes, sometimes medication. All of it lessens the distress and negative impact of manic episodes. I know other people find their manic episodes to be challenging and distressing with a negative impact on their lives - they are beyond valid experiences too. I just wanted to show a different experience and it doesn't mean my manic episodes are any less of a manic episode. I have the same changes (without psychosis though) but maybe manic episodes don't always have to have a negative impact or be disruptive.

Just like Autistic folks can have different levels of support needs and even have their support needs fluctuate day to day I view manic episodes similarly; different people need different levels of support during a manic episode because every manic episode is different and people also exist in different environments. Plus, everyone has different access to tools, accommodations and adjustments which impacts the support needed too. I see myself as having low support needs during a manic episode at this stage of my life because I have access to accommodations, tools, a support system and I can also adjust my environment. I've still had a few manic episodes over the past few years that have needed a higher level of support but when I didn't have access to any those things especially in my early twenties, my support needs were so much higher.

I guess that’s why I view bipolar as both neurodivergent and a disability.